Redstocking Grandma: Best Toys

October 8, 2007

Best Toys

As my grandson, now five months, begins to play with toys, I have been thinking about toys and children. As the pictures show, blocks are my favorite. We had a huge collection; I have saved them for my grandchildren. Blocks were great for sibling sharing; they were everyone's toys. My recommendations:

books
blocks
indoor slide or climbing toy
outdoor climbing structure
water
bubbles
musical instruments
sand
pets
cooking, baking
gardening even if only on windowsill
endless art supplies
classic music, ballet music
lots of pieces of one and only one building toy; we have legos
dressup clothes, scarves, etc.-
dolls, stuffed animals, little people for use with lego and blocks
as much time as possible outdoors--gardens, backyards, parks, playgrounds, zoos, beaches, trees puddles, flowers, weeds, grass, birds, bugs, worms, etc.
New York City

I don't recommend toys with batteries or computer chips for babies and toddlers. They need to learn the real world before the virtual world. Ideally, kids before two shouldn't watch TV or dvds or play with computers. After two, children should only watch when interacting with parents and caregivers. Try to resist the temptation to plop your baby in front of the TV. She would be better off banging pots in the kitchen. She would be better off helping you clean the bathroom or do the laundry. We didn't have a TV set from 1977 to 1983 and I never regretted it.

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In the late 60s and early 70s, I belonged to Redstockings, a NYC feminist group. Becoming a grandma to 9 grandkids since 2007 has resurrected my 60s activism, but made me increasingly critical about what passes for feminism. My misgivings at age 25 have been prescient.

Feminists became the unwitting handmaidens of corporate capitalism. Once huge numbers of women entered the paid work force, wages stagnated. You were no longer able to support a family on one well paying union job. Women increasingly were forced to work. The option of staying home with your children became increasingly unaffordable. The government used to pay women to stay home with their young kids. The desirability of having one parent at home with young children has been derided as impractical.

Early activists emphasized abortion over child care. Now we psychiatric drug our kids into obedience to the most child unfriendly nation on earth. Upper and middle class women in the US are might be far better off. But poor women and children are worse off.

Being a full-time mother to my four brilliant daughters for 16 years and a nanny to my oldest grandson were the best years of my life. Being with young kids is my bliss.

Families are my passion. My parents were both the oldest of 7. I have 5 younger brothers, 4 daughters, 4 sons-in-law, 9 grandkids,10 and under. The oldest of 45 first cousins, I have 11 nieces and nephews, 12 great nieces and nephews. I have been an editor of psychiatric books, a children's and teen librarian, a childbirth educator, a breastfeeding counselor, a social worker, an internet educator, a full-time mother, a 24/7 caregiver of my mom, a social media activist. I spent three months at Occupy Wall Street as a volunteer social worker, informal mom, big sister, aunt, grandma.